


This Was Supposed to be Fun, Get Out

by bigred (ryouta)



Series: dcu pokemon go shenanigans [1]
Category: Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics)
Genre: Gen, Pokemon GO Shenanigans, it's how he flirts okay, tim likes to troll jason
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-17
Updated: 2016-07-17
Packaged: 2018-07-24 11:49:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7507180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ryouta/pseuds/bigred
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Jason is going to kill us."</p><p>"No, he'll probably kill you. Me, he will most likely push me off a roof, <i>again</i>."</p><p>"Tim, that was an accident okay? He just got excited."</p><p>"How in the hell do you <i>get excited catching a jigglypuff</i>?"</p><p>(the boys thought playing pokemon go would be fun)</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Was Supposed to be Fun, Get Out

"Jason is going to kill us."

"No, he'll probably kill you. Me, he will most likely push me off a roof, _again_."

"Tim, that was an accident okay? He just got excited."

"How in the hell do you _get excited catching a jigglypuff_?"

There was a pause and a shuffle. 

"...How often do you run into one?" Another pause of silence. "I don't know, Tim! You know Jason gets weird when he's catching pokemon."

Tim looked at him, leveling him with a look that screamed bullshit. "Do I have to remind you that it was your idea? He could have been oblivious to it all, but _you_ had to go and show and tell the whole family about your Pokemon Go escapades."

"Okay, to be fair I thought this could be a family bonding thing. How was I supposed to know that Jason would get competitive with this?" Dick leaned against the side of the building they were perched on, his phone practically glued to his face. "Oh! Look! There's a pidgey right next to you!" 

"I'm going to stop you there because one; you have too many of those, you need to get rid of some. And two; how did you not know? Seriously? There's a gym in Crime Alley and Jason gets all pissy and more violent then usual if someone else beats his pokemon. Then he hunts them down. And from the few times I was with him, he broke their phones. How is that not competitive?" Tim had glanced to the side that Dick motioned to and stared balefully at the spot the bird was probably in. 

He glanced at him own phone, as it chimed to alert him of a pokemon in the area. Shit. "I'll be right back, there's a kadabra over on that other roof."

"What? No! Don't leave me, this pidgey is being difficult. Tim, _Tim_ please! I don't want to die."

Tim rolled his eyes, pushing himself up off the ground where he originally planted himself. "Dick, the whole point of this is to move around? If I see something I want, and it's in Jason's territory, I will have it no matter what. Like a couple days ago there was a gyarados in Jason's apartment. Do you think that stopped me?" He grinned back at Dick before leaping over to the next roof over.

"Look, I caught it, now call down. I think I'm going to battle gym."

Dick looked over at him with a look of pure horror. "I'm sorry, didn't we just have this conversation a couple minutes ago? Do you want Jason to break your phone?"

"Please, he's going to have more things to worry about than us in his territory, Dick." Tim smirked, taking one las look at the terror on Dick's face before grappling away from the area.

Dick groaned and let his head bump back against the building. "I'm going home."

\-------------

The next day it was a quiet morning in the Wayne Manor. The only immediate sounds heard were the sizzling of bacon in the kitchen, and the crunching of cereal as Tim half leaned into his bowl. Tim had his phone tucked away so Alfred wouldn't notice, but there was no way the old man didn't know. He could see Dick and Damian doing the same thing. The Manor seemed to have some of the good pokemon.

He heard Damian mumbling something about catching a scyther right before he came down, and Dick and his _pidgeys_. Bruce was at the head of the table, too into the newspaper to even want to know what they were doing. If it got them to stop bickering, then he was okay with it.

Though is seemed Tim's quiet, peaceful morning was shattered when the door was opened and slammed shut. "Okay, which one of you fuckers am I going to kill today?"

"Good morning to you too, Jason," Tim hummed, swiping up on his phone and successfully catching a ponyta that was chilling behind Bruce.

"No, not good morning, Replacement. I am going to murder someone." Jason seethed, reaching for an extra bowl that was placed on the table and the box of cereal that was next to Tim. 

"And why's that?" 

"Well, if you really want to know, _someone_ beat my gym. And they are going down."

Dick immediately looked up, alarmed. "What? Who was it?"

"Some asshole named _redhoodsucks_. And if I'm right, it's someone I know. I'm wanting to bet it's one of you asswipes." Jason tossed his phone on the table.

"How do you know it's one of us? It could be a citizen that doesn't like Red Hood?"

"Because shut up. To be honest, I think it's you, you little shit," Jason jabbed his spoon in Tim's direction and reached over to snatch up his phone. 

Of course they were all expecting Tim to lash and out snatch his phone back. Even Bruce glanced up from his paper to watch. 

"The asshole is also blue. Like he's mocking me or something, and I know you like to mock me." Tim was not impressed, but he knew this would happen. The corner of his lips twitched up some.

"Damn, babybird, you need better security on this." The man unlocked the phone and immediately brought up the app. Dick kept an eye on Tim and when their eyes met, Dick couldn't help but shake his head like _it's been nice knowing you, little brother_.

Jason paused for a moment, brows furrowing. "What kind of stupid name is this? _2cool4u_? What are you, 8?"

"All the other names I wanted were taken, surprisingly. Wally played his off mine. His is _2fast4u_. We're trying to get Kon to get one but he still can't figure out how to do more then dial a number. Bless his soul. Anyways, are you done interrogating us?"

"For now." Jason finished up the cereal and stood. "Oh, and if I see either of you," he looked back and forth from Tim and Dick to make sure they knew, "in my territory while in uniform, I'm shooting you."

"But Jay! You have so many pidgey's there."

"Are all you have pidgeys? Because that's just sad."

"They're cute okay, and I'm naming them after the family. It'll be an army."

"I told him to get rid of them, but he won't listen," Tim sighed, pulling his phone back to himself.

"You know what, whatever, I'm out." Jason scooted the chair back in, because Alfred did teach him manners, and promptly left, slamming the door again.

A few moments passed before it felt safe to talk again.

Dick looked over at his brother, "Tim, I'm actually surprised it wasn't you that beat his gym."

"Please, you know you can have two accounts, right?"

Tim grinned wide at Dick's appalled face.

" _redhoodsucks_ was genius."


End file.
